Road Block in week 4...

"We can't plan life. All we can do is be available for it."
-- Lauryn Hill

Today marks a month of officially being in this country, which means a few things. First off, I feel somewhat accomplished that I haven't cried and begged my mom to bring me home yet :) And second, I am definitely feeling a ball of emotions going into this week. Today is definitely one of the roughest days I've had here, well this week has been the roughest in general. My patience is being tested in a few ways. Its like everyday is completely different than the last. Our health sessions is probably the one part of my day I don't look forward too, only because there are 24 of us that cram in a small room, and well let's just say we have maaany different personalities within four walls. We also seem to discuss the same topics as the week before. I can't tell you how many times we've had sessions on malaria, hygiene, and sanitation. It just gets old after a while, and my attention has definitely plateaued this week. And I'm tired. Yes I go to bed usually around 9 and wake up at 6, but my body feels so strange. Its completely different than what I'm used to. Today however, we have a day off! In the morning we went in smaller groups to cross the Swaziland border to renew our visas, but of course since we're still trainees we can't venture or play in bordering countries until we're sworn in, so it was nice to at least look at Swazi from a distant view. I can't explain how happy I am that I can do whatever I want for the rest of the day. No one to tell me when to eat, study, or bathe.

Right now I'm sitting at the hotel - a spot which used to be "my spot," until the other 70 trainees found out this could also be "their spot." So I don't feel like I have a "spot" anymore, or a place where I can be alone, but it happens. Of course I have my room in my family's house, but I can't lock myself in there the whole day - otherwise they'd think I'm anti-social or just weird. I spend time everyday with my little sisters. We color, they help me with my Portuguese while I help them learn English, we watch movies (they have a DVD which is fabulous), take pictures, dance to that Beiber boy, and just read. I like my host family because they respect my space. They know when my door is closed its my alone time, and when I sit in the living room its an open invitation for us to chat or just sit in each other's company. The first week I was living here, I absolutely dreaded going in my casa, because it was just so awkward to be around them. But now its like we all laugh together, and I actually feel like part of their family. Though the language still presents a small barrier, it has gotten better as I've said before. I've just decided that I must spend more time going over vocabulary, and talking to locals, because as much as I love my friends here we never practice in portuguese.

I'm also sending letters with a current volunteer who is going home to the states over the holidays, so expect goodies from me within a month. When I get to site I'll have a new address, so my mail will be forwarded there.

For now I'm going back to minha casa for lunch, I'm extremely hungry. Caio!